WARNING - This is a little messed up.... seriously, not the big happy family ending most expect. I will also say, contains the incoherent thought of Mad Man Len, and isn't exactly meant to make a whole load of sense.... Don't say I didn't warn you... Enjoy.
Underneath a purple umbrella. That's where I first saw her. I saw her from behind, only her pink, floral skirt and long legs showing from behind the purple material, but even then, she had capture my imagination. She seemed like spring. By looking at her, I knew the seasons had changed. Just like that.
I wanted to know what she looked like, how bright her smile was, how her melodic voice sounded. Would she sing for me? One day? Some day?
Even then I wanted to know how her days at work went or if something was troubling her. I already wanted to much and I knew that I could never have her. She was already walking away, slipping into the crowd. Now all I could see was that umbrella. That one last hope. I knew I couldn't give up. I knew that I had to follow it, because it would lead me to her.
"Len... You okay... I know I told you that my eyes were up here... but you don't have to look away completely." Of course I heard the voice of the girl sitting across from me. She was just here for the money, or my looks... I couldn't tell with girls like this anymore. Another random blind date I had been sent on by my friends. They thought that being twenty and not being in a steady relationship for three years was a bad thing, but they didn't know the truth. I had already tasted pure love and had to let it go. I didn't want to let it go again.
I stood up, leaving the gold digging girl at the table of the coffee shop. I left. I didn't look back. I tried my hardest to keep the purple umbrella in view. I ran in attempt to keep up. As I did, so many questions popped up in my head. Would this girl even compare to the [hair colour] haired girl I had spent my teenage years with? Would she even want to be with me? There was no time to think these things. I just had to keep the purple in sight.
I wanted to know what type of lover she would be. If she would be as kind to me as [Name] was. If she would hold me the way [Name] did or kiss me like she did. If I could love her. More importantly, would she love me back?
A glimpse of purple flashed by my eyes and I found myself changing direction down by the traffic lights. I wondered if she ever noticed me following, if she realised I was keeping up. Only just keeping up, unable to get closer to her. I didn't mind. It gave me time to think about what I was doing. Why was I following a girl I had never met, never seen, before in my life? It was like a primitive instinct. Follow the purple. Never let it go. Hunt it down... hunt it down.... till the end.
Maybe it was the colour that caught my attention, maybe it wasn't her . The bright purple filled me with hope and longing. It reminded me of her. Why? Why did purple remind me of [Name]? Ah, I remembered. [Name]'s fifteenth birthday. That's what I had given her. A purple umbrella.
I wanted to ask her if she had gotten it at the same place as [Name]. If she had given up love once before. If it was a memento from that person, like name's purple umbrella was from me. A sign of love. I wanted to know if she was ready for a new love. If she was like me.
She stares up at the post office window, a collage of posters and flyers. I could finally see her face. She was pretty. Not as pretty as my [Name] was, but she had a beautiful uniqueness. She looks at one in particular, pain filling her eyes. "Lost Dog" the poster read. More like "Lost Heart".
I wanted to know what she noticed when he looked up there? Was the missing dog all she had eyes for? Did she notice the "Missing Person" poster that was pinned up?
After a few minutes, she moved on, this time, at a slower pace. I didn't hurry to catch up now. She wasn't moving fast enough to lose. I stared up at the poster of the missing girl. The picture that stared down at me... was my little[Name]. Sure she was only seventeen in that picture, but I saw her as beautiful. More beautiful than any other woman. Beautiful forever. The date she went missing was three years ago. No one had seen [Name] disappear, and they never ruled out murder. Never. But they couldn't find the body. Never.
Murder is such a harsh word.
Still, she is beautiful in death. Just like then.
I turned back around and looked at the girl I had been pursuing. I didn't know whether to chase after her or not. I didn't know whether they would count that as cheating on [Name]. After all she's still in my heart. She's still with me after all these years. Her reality may have drifted away, but I still have the memories. She will never leave me. Never.
She was mine.
I wondered if the girl would like to meet [Name]. If they would be nice to each other. If, someday I could hold both of them. All of them.
They would obviously get along. They were so alike after all. Just like all the other girls who had came after name. I met them all in a similar way. Holding on to a purple umbrella. In the end, they were all nothing like her. But still, that couldn't be changed.
With a sigh I ran to catch up with her. It was a routine by now. A deadly game of chase. I would introduce myself, asked her out and by the end of the week it would be over. No-one would suspect a thing....
.... And there would be one more bloody, purple umbrella to add to my collection.